Sexuality has become an area of social competence where individuals strive to be recognized as socially and sexually competent people. At the same time, Norwegians have begun to debut sexually later, writes Professor Bente Træen.

Sex for the first time: Norwegian teens are postponing their sexual debut

A fear of unclear boundaries and a lack of control in intimate encounters may contribute to young Norwegians postponing the onset of sexual intercourse.

The first time you had intercourse or sex!

This is a special experience that most people remember well, and the findings from research about this event are usually very reliable.

Now new research is available on when Norwegians have their sexual debut – a personal experience that also tells us something about social development.

More diverse sex

In the old days, we asked people when they had intercourse for the first time and assumed that most people would think of sex with vaginal penetration. Today we have learned more and pose questions in a way that also embraces the fact that people now have much more diverse sex than penis-in-vagina penetration.

In the University of Oslo’s 2020 Sexual Habits Survey (Seksualvaneundersøkelse), we measure the age of onset for various forms of penetrative sex. In penetrative sex, you can have an active role (the one who actively penetrates another person's body cavity), or a receiving role (the one who receives the penis, fingers or object).

We therefore distinguish between active and receptive sexual acts, such as vaginal sex, oral sex and anal sex.

Young women are having sex a little later

Among both men and women, with the exception of vaginal sex, there has been a general decrease in the age of debut among people born before 1951 to those born between 1991 and 2002.

In men, performing cunnilingus has become increasingly common at younger ages over generations; we found the same pattern in women for fellatio and receptive anal sex.

However, the age of onset of vaginal sex increased in the youngest birth cohort of women (born 1991–2002).

Women aged 70 and above had vaginal sex for the first time on average at the age of 20,2 years. Women aged 40-40 had their sexual debut at the age of 17,3 years.

The increase from this then, is seen among the youngest women, aged 18-29 years, who on average debut at 17,7 years.

Overall, the results from the 2020 Sexual Habits Survey are similar to results from previous Norwegian studies of heterosexual individuals, also with regard to gender differences. Since the beginning of the 1970s, women in the Nordic countries have had their first intercourse earlier than men.

Men aged 70 and above first had intercourse at the age of 21,2 years old. The young men aged 18-29 were having sex for the first time when they were 18,6 years old.

This is explained by the fact that the social acceptance of youth and women's sexuality is greater in the Nordic countries compared to the majority of other Western countries. The roots of this difference go back to pre-Christian patterns of marriage, where it was tolerated for young people to test out their sexuality before marrying.

The development of women's and men's onset of intercourse

Women's onset ages:

  • Receptive vaginal sex can only be experienced by women since only women have a vagina.
  • Receptive vaginal onset age for heterosexual women 70+ years (20.2 years, born between 1931 and 1990) decreased.
  • The lowest age of onset is found among women aged 40-49 (17.3 years).
  • However, among the youngest women (18-29 years, born 1991-2002), the median age of onset increased to 17.7 years. Ergo, the vaginal debut age in Norway has increased.
  • With regard to oral sex with a male partner, the age of onset fell from 25.9 years among 70+ year old women to 18.3 years among 18-29 year old women.
  • The proportion of women who had experienced receptive anal sex was highest among 40-49-year-olds (61.9 per cent) and lowest among those aged 70+ (17.2 per cent).
  • Among 18-29-year-old women, the median age of first anal sex was 25.9 years.

Men's onset ages:

  • Women often choose a partner who is 2-3 years older than them the first time they have vaginal sex, while men often have a female partner of the same age or one year younger.
  • Men aged 70 or older had vaginal sex for the first time when they were 21.2 years old.
  • Among men aged 18-29 (born 1991-2002), the age of onset had fallen to 18.6 years.
  • Likewise, the age of debut for oral sex with a female partner fell from 35.6 years among men aged 70+ to 19.2 years among 18-29-year-old men.
  • The age of onset for active anal sex was lowest among 18-29-year-old men (26.9 years).

Our historical heritage

The ethnically homogeneous, non-feudal and sparsely populated Nordic countries, on the fringes of European civilization, accepted Christianity very late (10th to 11th centuries) and retained pre-Christian marriage law for many centuries thereafter. Pre-Christian traditions tolerated young people "lying together" before marriage.

The Nordic countries were non-feudal societies, which may explain why the prevailing social norms in these countries are traditionally characterized by an ideology of equality between all members of society.

This outlook meant that ideally every member of society, regardless of subculture, should be treated and judged equally. Consequently, the forms for expressing sexuality and the social codes that organized them must ideally be the same for all sexual actors.

On average, girls enter puberty before boys; therefore, an earlier age of onset of intercourse can reasonably be expected for heterosexual women than for men. But women's access to hormonal contraception is also of great importance. When the contraceptive pill became available to women, the fear of unplanned pregnancy no longer functioned as a check on female sexuality.

It’s been argued that following the #MeToo movement, men have increased awareness, confusion, anxiety and ambivalence about sexuality and what kind of behaviour is acceptable when approaching women (...)

Bente Træen, professor of health psychology at the University of Oslo

Decreased sexual interest

The age of sexual debut in Norway fell until 2002 and has been stable for the two decades since. The impression from the popular media – that teens’ first intercourse age is continuing to drop – is thus not correct.

Since the 2000s, greater sexual diversity has also been recorded, and experimentation and new long-acting hormonal contraceptive methods have been developed.

However, the age of sexual debut has remained stable.

Willy Pedersen and co-authors (2021) found the same trend among young people in Oslo. In our study among the general Norwegian population, the increase cannot be said to be due to an increased proportion of the population with an immigrant background – very few of the participants in the survey have a religious background other than Christianity. Most survey participants actually considered themselves non-religious.

Another interesting change has occurred along with the change in the age of debut: 37 per cent of women and 24 per cent of men aged 18–29 reported reduced sexual interest in the past year over a period of three months or longer.

Performance expectations and sexual identity

Sexuality has become an area of social competence where individuals strive to be recognized as socially and sexually competent people. An in-depth interview study among 18-29-year-old women revealed four themes in their reasons for and experiences of living with reduced sexual desire.

These themes were: 1) physical and mental health, 2) being a young woman in today's society, 3) cohabitation factors and 4) negative past experiences.

These themes may reflect the effect of living in an age with great demands to be sexually competent, and perhaps young adults are inclined to delay the onset of sexual intercourse for fear of not being competent enough.

The increased focus on gender identity and sexual identity can add to making young people question who they are and what they want. The fourth theme obviously points to having been exposed to abuse and trauma, but perhaps part of the explanation can also lie in the effect of recent years' focus on sexual offences.

Increased consciousness after #MeToo

It has been argued that following #MeToo, men have gained increased awareness, confusion, anxiety and ambivalence about sexuality and what kinds of behaviour are acceptable when approaching women – and the consequences of getting it wrong.

Some research suggests that men's fear of negative consequences became more prominent in the post-#MeToo era, triggering an anxiety about doing something wrong when meeting a woman. It is possible that some young men today are afraid of being charged with sexual harassment and offences; they feel uncertain about boundaries and the consequences of pushing them.

Women may be more aware of what constitutes an offence, but they lack practice in setting boundaries. This can cause uncertainty regarding perceived control in intimate encounters. This anxiety may be the reason why young Norwegians today postpone the onset of sex.

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Read the Norwegian version of this article at forskning.no

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