What determines whether you have a good sex life as an older adult?
If you had an active sex life when you were young, the same will probably be true as you age.
Published
That’s what researchers found in a large study of the sexuality of older women and men in Norway, Denmark, Belgium and Portugal.
One of the researchers who participated in the project, Nantje Fischer, has now submitted her doctoral dissertation to the University of Oslo’s Department of Psychology.
Her research delves into a topic that is seldom studied.
Fischer wanted to know what differed between older people who believe they have an active, good sex life and those who don’t?
Her study is based on answers from people aged 60 to 75 who described their sex life in a questionnaire.
Emotional closeness
The most important thing about being sexually active as an older person is having a positive attitude towards your own sexuality, the study shows.
It’s also important to understand that sex matters for both your relationship and your physical and mental health, she found.
“Ageing can affect your sex life, but not necessarily in a negative way. If you feel that you are emotionally and sexually intimate with your partner, you’re more likely to be satisfied with your sex life,” Fischer said.
Differences in desire
If the couple has different levels of interest in sex, it can cause them to have sex less often.
It also means they may experience less emotional intimacy than when they first got involved.
“Having less sex and less emotional intimacy will mean you are less satisfied with your sex life,” she said.
Another important factor in governing whether or not you have an active sex life is whether or not your partner has sexual problems.
More similar than different
There is not that much research on older adults' sexuality. The existing studies come mostly from the United States.
Fischer therefore believes that her study is unique.
“We have samples that represent different geographical areas in Europe, so that we can make direct comparisons between countries. That’s very unique,” she said.
She says that the researchers initially thought that they would find large differences in factors related to sexual activity in the different countries.
“We often think that people in the Nordic countries have a different sexual culture than in southern Europe, for example,” she said.
But instead of finding major differences, researchers found striking similarities between the countries. This was true, for example, regarding how important it is to have positive attitudes towards one's own sexuality. This applies just as strongly in Portugal as in Denmark.
Portuguese men have more frequent intercourse
The researchers also found some interesting differences.
Portuguese men, for example, stand out because they have intercourse as often as two to three times a week. This is far more frequent than men in Norway, Denmark and Belgium, where men typically have intercourse about two to three times a month.
Of the men in the survey, it is perhaps not so surprising then that the Portuguese are most satisfied with their sex life. Among women, it is the Nordic people who are most satisfied.
However, the number of study participants from the different countries varied widely.
In Norway, 68 per cent have agreed to participate.
In Portugal, just over a quarter of those asked were willing to take part in the survey. Many withdrew from participating after an initial telephone conversation. The reluctance to participate means that there is more uncertainty connected to the data from Portugal.
Uncomfortable to think about
There has been little research on the elderly and sex in the past.
Bente Træen, a professor of health psychology at the University of Oslo, led the European study.
She explains the absence of research in this area in this way:
“Scientists are like other people. We think of sexuality as something for the young and pretty. The fact that the elderly have sex is kind of an uncomfortable thought,” Træen said to sciencenorway.no in 2018.
Fischer also believes that sex has traditionally been thought of as something that does not concern the elderly.
“Societal values tend to ‘infect’ the research,” she said.
Less sex with age
Both interest in sex and sexual activity decline as people get older.
“Although there is a decrease in frequency, that doesn’t necessarily mean a decrease in quality,” says Fischer.
“There are a number of studies that show that even if your sex drive decreases and you have problems with function, you’re not so concerned about this when you get older. You value other aspects of cohabitation to a greater extent,” she said.
The Norwegian researchers have not specifically investigated this.
“But we we know from previous research that people’s sex lives change in expression and form as they get older. They often expand their understanding of what sexual activity is,” Fischer said.
Cuddling and hugging more important
Most people become more interested in emotional and sexual intimacy as they grow older, and actual intercourse becomes less significant, Fischer said.
“Kissing, cuddling, hugging and touching seem to become more central as people get older. Emotional closeness in a relationship is very important for having a good sex life as an older adult,” she said
Researchers don’t know whether good health leads to more sex or if a lot of sex leads to good health. But many studies show that the two are connected, Fischer said.
Norwegians masturbate the most
Bente Træen has previously said to sciencenorway.no that her study of the sexual habits of the elderly led to some surprising findings.
“When I say that I was surprised, it’s not that I’m making comparisons with previous studies. There aren’t many of them. It's more about the societal myths we have about the elderly and sex,” she said.
She is surprised by how many older people are sexually active. More than 90 per cent of Norwegian men between the ages of 60 and 75 are sexually active, as are 75 per cent of women.
“Many masturbate and have intercourse quite often. I’m surprised that the elderly are generally so happy with their sexuality,” Træen said.
Norwegian men and women are at the top when it comes to masturbation.
Fully 65 per cent of men and 40 per cent of women say they have satisfied themselves in the last month.
Very few Portuguese men and women say they have masturbated.
Translated by: Nancy Bazilchuk
Reference:
Nantje Fischer, Healthy sexual aging: Sexual activity and satisfaction in older partnered heterosexual adults from four European countries, Doctoral dissertation, University of Oslo, 2020
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Read the Norwegian version of this article on forskning.no
