She encourages parents to insist that children contribute at home.
Sense of responsibility and independence
Annonse
Yvonne Severinsen is a specialist psychologist and a PhD candidate in developmental psychology at the University of Oslo. She believes most parents agree that it is good for children to have tasks at home.
She says there are many benefits to children participating in household chores, such as experiencing mastery, increasing their sense of responsibility, and strengthening family bonds.
"By doing tasks at home, children develop a sense of responsibility and a feeling of being independent," says Severinsen.
At the same time, how tasks are assigned is very important , she says.
Some of psychologist Sofie Münster's task tips
Two-three years
Put away their toys
Carry a cup/plate to the table
Hang up their jacket and neatly place their shoes
Put clothes in the wardrobe
Four-seven years
Set and clear the table
Empty/load the dishwasher
Tidy up their own room
Water plants or help with other gardening tasks
Eight-ten years
Cleaning, such as vacuuming
Have a cooking day
Fold and put away laundry
Ten years and older
Wash their own clothes, hang them up, and fold them
"Parents must show flexibility," Severinsen tells sciencenorway.no.
By this, she means that parents must consider both the developmental level and maturity of the child.
Psychologist specialist Yvonne Severinsen emphasises the need for judgment when assigning tasks to children.(Photo: Private)
"Four-year-olds can be very different, so expectations and demands must be set based on the specific child," she says.
This also means that Sofie Münster's list should be used with discretion.
How insistent should parents be?
"This is great inspiration, but each family should use such lists as guidance and inspiration. Trust yourself and apply it in a way that suits your family's situation and your child," advises Severinsen.
Some children remember and manage to hang up their jacket and put their shoes away in the hallway when they are three years old. Others reach six or seven years old and still struggle to remember, says Severinsen.
"Chores play a role in a child's overall development and ability to interact with others," Sofie Münster tells the Danish newspaper.
She believes it is important to insist that children participate – such as in cooking – despite tough discussions and resistance.
Annonse
"Should not create too much conflict"
Severinsen prefers to call them tasks rather than chores.
"The latter might, for some, be associated with coercion. Regular tasks and clear expectations can help develop a healthy sense of duty and serve as good preparation for adulthood. But coercion is not the way to go," she believes.
Children often cooperate better in daily routines such as getting dressed, bedtime, and household chores if they are given simple choices within a framework set by the adult. Would they prefer to set the table or empty the dishwasher?
"It gives the child a sense of control when they get to participate in making choices," says Severinsen.
She recommends recognition and encouragement rather than punishment and threats.
"Children need plenty of space for play and creativity. Tasks should not create too much conflict – otherwise, the benefits quickly disappear in the struggle," she says.
Severinsen adds that it is important to remember to give specific tasks.
Clear goals – easier to succeed
"That way, it becomes very clear to children when they have accomplished something. 'Helping in the kitchen' is an abstract task – it's difficult for a child to know when they have succeeded," says Severinsen, adding:
"But if you ask them to unload the dishwasher or take out the trash, it's clear when the task is done, and they can experience a sense of achievement. That, in turn, motivates them to do more."
The same principle applies to both children and adults, says Severinsen:
"When you set concrete and clear goals, it's easy to know whether you've succeeded or not."
She believes many kindergartens are good at integrating tasks with play and a positive atmosphere, and parents might find inspiration from them.
"Children like routines. Kindergartens, for example, might have a specific 'tidy-up song.' When the fun song plays, the kids know it's time to tidy up. It's guided by expectations," says Severinsen, adding:
"Tidying up may seem very simple, but it's something a young child has to learn."
"Invite the child to collaborate"
Not all children have been given tasks from the age of two or three. Perhaps there haven't been many routines at home.
So what should parents do if they want to introduce routines when their child is eight to ten years old?
"I would do it in a way that invites the child to collaborate. I would first provide a good explanation of why I am introducing this change. It must be an explanation that an eight-to-ten-year-old can understand," says Severinsen.
She would then invite the child to participate by suggesting or choosing between different tasks.
"I would also make sure that the task the child starts with is something I am confident they can succeed in. Mastery builds good self-esteem and motivation to do more," she says.
